I don't understand.

I don't get it. I'm I really immature? Do I really lack discipline? Is it wrong to enjoy my high school life? Is it wrong to enjoy with my friends? *sigh*

I don't know if I should say sorry. I really think there's nothing wrong. Did I really change in a bad way? How? Am I really different from who I was before? Please. I need someone to tell me.

And I thought love wasn't like that. You said you'd love whoever I was. I never thought you had requirements for my personality. I don't get you. Why do we always fight over the same thing again and again and again? I don't know if I should let you go. I don't know what's right and what's wrong anymore. I feel that I gave up so much for you. I really do.

If it would only end up this way, why did you even tell me you love me in the first place? Why did you make me fall in love with you?! I should have been pretty normal right now. Maybe It would have been better for me to be trapped in to my little fantasy. Maybe I should have stayed in love with anime characters instead of choosing you.

But you know, I enjoy every single moment I spend with you. I love our laughter and your smile is always like sunshine. I love watching you in uniform and your sense of humor (though it might be blunt) always always makes my day a little bit brighter. You bring color to my dull world, Koitan. I love you soooooooooooo much. But I don't feel you anymore.

Why odn't you tell me what's wrong? You do trust me do you? Please talk...

HOLY COW. WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO BE SO COMPLICATED?!
..so much for my happy ending.

I FINALLY FOUND A NEW BAG I COULD WASTE MY MONEY ON 8D

OH MY GAWD I FOUND AN ORIGINAL VIVIENNE WESTWOOD BAG DOWNTOWN FOR ONLY 25% OF THE REAL PRICE OH MY GAWD OH MY GAWD I'M TOTALLY GETTING THAT BAG NO MATTER WHAT. I'M NOT GOING TO EAT FOR THREE WEEKS JUST TO GET MY HANDS ON THAT BAG. THAT BAG IS MINE!!!!!! >8D

price is JUST P750 OH MY GAWD

I maybe Hatsumomo, but you will never be Sayuri

I notice something odd with my house maid.

She copied my hairstyle.
She copied my hair color.
She copied my shampoo.
She buys high heels.
She copies my expressions.
...and now she has the same lotion as I do.

wtf. It's irritating you know. darn.

what?!

I like feminine looking guys, not feminine ACTING guys. For the love of cake, people. Leave me be! >__<>:(


Ah~ Miyavi~!


..and yes. He's male. Stupid people.

..just a little thought.

"Aasenso lamang ang Pilipinas kung mag tatrabaho ang mga Pilipino para sa bayan, at hindi lang para sa sarili."

-certain cell in my brain.

Special mention kay Sir Economics. Sorry tulog ko gina, haha. Four hours lang ytulog ko, eh. :D

Happy Day~

Yay! Today was the handing down of the positions of officers whatever of our CAT (Citizen Advancement Training)... I was happy for him, because he's the corps commander. Well, a girlfriend can't be proud enough, no? ;D

And, the issue is over. He told me a while ago that he didn't want to talk to me just because he wanted to make the first move. LOL. XD

And man my legs hurt! Standing there for more than an hour is really a pain in the hind. My back hurts, my legs hurt and my feet hurt. But man, did I enjoy it. It felt really nostalgic, since all this time, we were bashing CAT and our officers. But now it feels like we're going to miss it because that was the last time we formed. TwT

The fun part was, our commandant gave us snacks before we were dismissed, so we had sandwiches stuck to our mouths while forming. One of my classmates even put his sandwich in his pocket. rofl.

Anyway, I really owe a lot to my officers. I mean, they really do deserve the position they currently have, and I really do look up to them. Because they always arrive earlier before all off us do, stand longer than all of us do, get punished for our faults and well, they teach us even if they're so tired they wouldn't even want to blink. I don't know why I "rebelled", but maybe it was because I was so envious of them.

Yeah. I wanted to be one of them. I wish I could turn back time and join the officers. So I would be the one standing beside him, and not Ojo. hahaha. :)

>:(

It's really getting on my nerves. I hate this. I don't like it when people ignore me.
It's really really really frustrating.

Why can't he just tell me what's wrong?!

I had enough. All this time it's always been me who needs to understand. I always have to say sorry... I always have to make the first move. It's tiring, you know. Really.

I envy one of my friends for having such a wonderful boyfriend, who understands her and would always stays with her no matter what. I would love that kind of guy. A real guy who would always do everything for his girl. A guy who would always put so much effort for a girl that he loves.

I know I maybe asking too much from my boyfriend, but really.

All I need is a little bit of understanding.

I don't want to break up with him, because I love him. So much. But if he's forcing me to do what we both don't want to do, then... I don't know.